Tuesday, May 31, 2011

a little somethin'

So a couple weeks ago my English teacher had us do a creative writing. At first I thought it was really stupid, but I ended up having a lot of fun with it. So here it is.


If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you will want to know is how I ended up in this place. It all started last week while I was staying here in a cheap motel near Central Park. I looked out the window and saw...piles and piles of snow. I was getting ready to leave, and before I knew it, I was snowed in. I am not sure when I will be able to leave this place, but there is no food, and the heater is broken. My skin is slowly deteriorating, and my heart is overwhelmed by the amount of anxiety cast upon my shoulders. I am the only one here, and there is no cell service. I have tried using the house phone, but the lines have been disconnected. I keep hearing these voices, as if someone is here in the room beside me. My soul is aching, and I am trapped completely. I have tried everything possible, although every time I try something new, I find myself that much closer to this Hope. I trust that I will be able to escape, but right now it feels as if I am being punished and tortured for something I once did, as if this is happening for a reason. The walls are slowly and creepily closing in on me, but there is this Light. This is the only Glimpse that shines though the window both during the day and night. This Light never fades away, and I know it will never leave nor forsake me. When all else fails, and when all is darkness, I know I can look to that Light for the One and only Hope this precious and feeble life has to offer. I know I am not alone, I am just one step closer.

Your Light will shine when all else fails.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

procrastination? yes please.

          boy, I have not been on this thing in months. Instead of writing my critical essay, I have decided to not conquer procrastination and blog instead. In the past couple of months, I have just been reevaluating my life and everything that comes along with it. Nonetheless, it's been hard, but very eye-opening and a huge glimpse at God's better purpose. A couple months ago I listened to one of Francis Chan's sermons on surrender, and I think of it everyday. Me, out of all people, try my best to avoid this topic of "surrender". In complete and utter honesty, I like things to go my way and through that I still strive to give all glory and praise to God. But what I have learned is actually the very opposite of this. Through this new stage of life, I have acquired the knowledge of what true surrender looks like. I have given up numerous possessions and materials, and yes, it was hands down one of the toughest things to do, but through that God rewards you. Trials surely are your mercies in disguise.
          On a different note, four of the girls in my small group got baptized today, and I also got to hear my best friend share her testimony at the 5 oclock service at my church. It was a blessed day full of weeping, laughter, rejoicing, and awakening. I feel so honored to have such dear friends, and an amazing church which I can call home. Be blessed my lovely friends and family.